There’s no denying that we live in a busy, hectic society that rarely slows down to take a pause. It’s easy to fall into the pressure “trap” of trying to always be "productive" or packing your schedule too full.
Unfortunately, that’s become the norm for far too many people. But, it can end up causing a lot of stress. That can quickly lead to feelings of anxiety or depression. It can also make you feel overwhelmed, burnt out, and not like yourself.
While it’s often easier said than done to “slow down,” one thing you can do to improve your actions each day and to find some relaxation is to “practice the pause.”
But, what does that mean, exactly?
What is Practicing the Pause?
A phrase coined by Lori Deschene, founder of the Tiny Buddha website, practice the pause means just what you think – stopping whatever you’re doing, even for a moment. The pause is designed to keep you from becoming overwhelmed or just stuck on autopilot.
When you’re too involved in something and haven’t taken a break, your stress levels go higher. You’re more likely to snap at someone, get distracted, or increase your risk of physical or mental health issues.
By practicing the pause and taking a deep breath, you’re giving your brain a step back, even if it’s just for a moment. That can completely change the way you look and feel about something, and help you to re-focus with purpose and less stress.
That’s the simplest form of pausing – stopping whatever you’re doing, taking a mindful breath, and continuing. But, it’s not the only way to practice the pause. There are plenty of effective techniques you can use. Try some of the following if you tend to get overwhelmed or stressed throughout the day.
Think Before You Answer a Question
When you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s easy to make snap judgments, or even answer questions in ways you otherwise wouldn’t. If someone is talking to you and asks a question, give yourself a conscious moment to think about your answer.
Pause. Think. Respond.
Even a few seconds of pondering your response might completely change what you say, and that can make a big difference.
Speak Slower
Have you ever noticed how fast people speak? You might even be guilty of it, yourself. It’s a learned behavior and sometimes might feel necessary in a world that is constantly on the go.
But, when you opt to speak a bit slower, you’re creating an atmosphere where people can fully take in your words. They will listen more closely and have an easier time understanding what you’re really trying to convey. So, talking slower isn’t wasting time. It’s ensuring that what you’re saying is being heard correctly the first time.
Pause Before Bad Habits
One of the great impacts of practicing the pause is moving on from bad habits (stress eating, smoking/drinking, impulse shopping, being impatient, snapping at others, etc).
We all have them, – things we’d like to change, or things we know aren’t good for us, but we have a hard time breaking away.
By practicing the pause before you partake in a bad habit, you can often talk yourself out of it. Bad habits are often triggered by stress. You do something familiar and comforting to alleviate that stress, even if it’s not good for you.
By pausing, you can focus on the underlying cause of your stress. Then you can opt to work on that cause and trigger, rather than throwing yourself into the habit. Or you can pause to re-orient towards your larger goals (being more healthy physically, having a deeper connection to others, saving for a special trip) that your bad habit will deter you from.
Practicing the pause is an easy and effective way to fight back against stress and to change your actions on a daily basis. Just like the phrase says, it does take practice. But, there’s no reason you can’t start trying it immediately. You might be surprised by how quickly you can notice a difference.
Contact Me
Do you need more help focusing on the present? The support of an experienced counselor can help you chart a new path. I’m here to help.
I know how stressful and demanding it can be to make changes in your life, but you don’t have to figure it out on your own. Some of the benefits of individual therapy include:
- Having a safe, confidential space to work through life’s struggles
- Speaking openly with a highly-trained professional
- Learning to be curious about oneself and become more mindful about your choices
- Identifying relationship patterns that are helpful, or existing patterns that are interfering with your growth and wellbeing.
- I offer online therapy (video conference style of therapy), which provides an increased level of comfort as you could meet with me from the privacy and comfort of your own home or other location.
*** The tips offered in this article are for general information and should not be considered medical or psychological advice. For more personalized recommendations appropriate to your individual situation, please contact us or obtain professional guidance.
You can request a specific appointment time that fits your schedule. Once confirmed, you can complete all New Patient Intake paperwork online as well.
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